Fighting over what is right or what is wrong could be useful. But what about fighting for what you believe in?
But how about fighting for what is ignored – the dreams that have gone by the wayside, ambitions for a more expansive world, the future of your children?
25 years of my life have been spent listening to what has been ignored by the men and women coming through my office doors – their desires for something bigger than trying to figure out how their business could survive another year or to figure out how their team could come together.
Behind these business desires, is the ever-looming and ever-growing question of what their business was created for in the first place – feeding their family, building a community, providing something of value to their customers – a vision of building something .. a legacy left behind that that elevates us beyond mere mammals to beings capable of altering and shifting futures.
I think we are facing a fundamental question core to our being today – “Are we willing to be dedicated to a future or dedicated to more of the same?”
To get to that point, we have to give up making ‘more of the same’ wrong – but to approach this fight as a fight for putting in what is missing – the fulfillment of what we see missing, rather than what is wrong.
What would our lives be like if we gave up fighting for what is right and wrong – but for what could be a great future for all of us?
If it feels hopeless or like you’re fighting through a dark time, continue reading to find another way.
5 Steps to Pull Yourself Up And Out Of Any Challenging Time
In business as in life, there comes a time for most of us, when we have to face a dark time. Dark clouds are as common as the weather changes. Sometimes, it may seem like they are here to stay forever, but life being unpredictable also dishes out the ‘good’ stuff.
So do not fret but do not stay on that couch too long.
There are some necessary things to understand about suffering: (I share this with you as a coach and as a fellow human being who has suffered through challenges)
- You can choose to prolong the suffering unnecessarily with unnecessary drama or significance. Have compassion for yourself – give some space to vent and to take it easy – but remember to keep the ‘edge of accountability and responsibility’ to resolution and creating a breakthrough.
- The suffering may be typically an indicator for you to deal with something internal – if you do not want to repeat this challenge, this may be the time to create more awareness of habits, ways of being, etc. that may not be working for you.
- If you deal with the suffering courageously and with your ‘full face and honesty’, you will come out of this stronger.
- To piggyback on #3 above, you will come out not only stronger but with the opportunity to truly transform who you are in a powerful and good way.
There are five stages to any transformation through a challenging or difficult time?
Notice your feelings, body sensations, thoughts, opinions, images in your mind, and do not try to change them. Just observe them for now.
Write down the facts i.e. what happened – not opinions but what actually happened. Keep reviewing what happened on that piece of paper – refine and review if you need to until you are clear that you have only the facts down. Notice any feelings, etc. that come up when you review the facts.
2. Normalization – where the feelings and reactions become normal or resolved.
Ask yourself the following questions:
- Are you willing to forgive yourself or others for what happened?
- Are you willing to let the feelings be and eventually disappear?
3. New Future or New Vision or New Context or “Recontextualization”
Create a new mission statement comprising of 3 sentences maximum that express what you want in your future. Memorize this statement so you can state this statement daily to yourself.
4. Structures for Fulfilling the new Future
Armed with this next future or vision or mission statement, ask yourself what systems or structures (e.g. plans with milestones, etc.) do you need to take this to fulfillment.
5. Accountability till the new Future is a done deal!
Ask yourself what kind of rigorous accountability you will need to make sure that this new future is resolved and your current challenges are a thing of the past?
Courage & Love in Business, Life, and Leadership
One of the main reasons that I stick to this business of coaching others is the privilege of being surprised by people who show courage in the face of stark and difficult choices – choices that include stepping away from a cushy job to starting a business, standing up to an unruly boss or client or taking a stand to spend 20 more hours a week with their kids, whilst pursuing what is important to them.
Once courage is shown and a promise is made – what inspires me and leaves me excited on a night such as this is that people see the value of being the source of their life i.e. that their word, their promise (as it is being kept) creates a whole new world. That their word creates a new destiny – heretofore never realized.
It is a simple choice.
To give birth to a dream takes love and courage.
It starts with a declaration that you will do it.
Then you do it.
Or you don’t.
But taking that first step. Oh, that precious first step. When you wave goodbye to a past and say hello to a future. That can be scary and exciting. But once that step is taken, the air gets quiet and you face yourself and your choice and your obstacles.
But for once maybe, yourself, your choice, and your obstacles are all one and the same. Maybe that is the greatest freedom of all.
5 Must-Have Traits to Gain Mastery and Stay True to Yourself in Marketing for Your Business
The challenges we face in being authentic in our marketplace
Many of you have mastery or experience e.g. 10 years or more of hard-won experience in a field of expertise. Some of you are on your way to mastery.
Then a portion of you is wondering when will your hard-earned mastery or expertise be recognized or acknowledged. We don’t see enough results despite our hard work.
We get frightened and panic – we sell out by adopting sales and marketing techniques that may not fit our styles, leaving us tired, burnt out, and discouraged.
Hey – I’ve done it. Not proud of it -been there and done that.
Most masters I know have the following traits:
- A sense that they know a lot.
- A sense that their value is questioned or deemed doubtful by others and themselves – that their upward climb is futile.
- It seems like their growth and development is never done. (“I feel like I am still starting out!”)
- That others (who may not have mastery) are getting ahead of them and that is both discouraging and frustrating.
- That emphasizing depth and mastery in their engagements with their market do not sell.
I do not pretend to have a comprehensive answer for everyone.
But I do have some hard-learned truths:
- Marketing has always and will probably be for a long time – all about distinguishing yourself and creating a compelling narrative that stands out from everyone else competing in your market.
- OPTION 1: The process of creating that compelling narrative is based on your ability to write good compelling marketing copy or messaging that attracts audiences to buy from you.
- OPTION 2: That process and that narrative can include the expression of depth – understanding, flexibility, and an appreciation for all the complexities that most of your customers experience.
It is OPTION 2 that I feel is critically missing in today’s marketing.
This is BOTH a missing and an opportunity for those of us who have depth, mastery, and intuitive deep understandings in our field of expertise.
We tend to think that going deep and sharing our wisdom may not land on friendly ears. I understand this sentiment and of course, we must tune our message to the audience. However, when we stop sharing the depth, irony, and high order wisdom that we have, I feel a part of me and us are robbed. I also feel that our audience is robbed of the opportunity to elevate themselves – basking in your high-order knowledge.
I have no generic solution in this article for you – because every one of you is different.
But I do have questions for you to ponder.
What if you could discover a way to market yourself whilst sharing your depth of understanding and wisdom – designed to elevate your community and not just oversimplify for the sake of making sales?
What would be different for you and in your business?
Since 1991, I’ve been reflecting on, designing, and implementing methodologies and systems for bringing a transcendent, creative and innovative approach to critical aspects of entrepreneurship.